Who'll Notice That I'm Not Around?

[hiddenmuse]

Yes, I've been hiding out the past several days.

Part of it's due to my going out and forcing myself to be sociable - if only to end up grumpy most of the time.

Another part of it would be my depression starting to really feel unbearable. I've been out of meds for a while *ducks and hides under desk for the next lifetime* ... and as is the case, I did alright for a short time. Then, things started to get really bad.

It's more than just apathy. I can't sleep for anything - or I over-sleep. My libido is gone again. My desire to be around anybody is almost nil. The most stupid, minor things, reduce me to tears. And it's taken me this damn long to get off my ass and call the doctor to get in for an appointment.

I really am fucked up - not like that's news to anyone, anymore.

Have a good evening everyone - I've got some work to finish up, then it's off to the Dentist and OA.

Comments

[rosesandvine.livejournal.com]

*hugs* I'm glad you're going to your doctor, and glad you realize you've waited longer than perhaps you should have. That's a good thing. Why you waited so long, only you can say. But, don't beat yourself up for it. (Yeah, you already knew it, but I feel it bears repeating). You are going through a difficult disease. One that tries to make you think you DON'T need meds, and once you're off of them saps you of your spirit and strength.

You are such a wonderful person to have around, Carly. I may not know you as well as others, but I've notice that you've made my journal a brighter place. You've definately made my friends' lives brighter, one in particular. Any time you doubt it, reread this post. I am proud of you for all you've gone through, and here to support you and listen.

[msmorgie.livejournal.com]

Yes I did notice you weren't around *smile*....and I am glad you realize that you need to talk to the doctor but I do know what you mean...I do get that way *hugs*

[luvlyssa.livejournal.com]

I noticed you weren't around... and missed your posts *hugs* get drugs.... and as someone that barely knows you, but knows *exactly* how it feels, no money no drugs it's a bad cycle made worse... would $20 help? seriously?

[bnlcoholic.livejournal.com]

So sorry to see you feeling this way. Wish I could do more to help than just *hugs* Hope you feel better, Carly, you're a great person, and you deserve it. *more hugs*

[bnakeded.livejournal.com]

*big big hugs* awwwww, girl, I hope you feel better soon!