hiddenmuse | (no subject)

This evening, when I was talking to Kellie, we were discussing our live journals. I mentioned that there are some people that I read, that they are so politically astute, write such intelligent, articulate entries - that when I attempt to write about similar topics, I feel like much of what I write probably comes across as immature. That I read like a bumbling 12 year old looking for something to angst over besides whether or not some boy likes me, and which teen idols are the dreamiest.

I know that I write whatever comes to mind - that sometimes, it does come across as being relatively intelligent, and other times, it may seem silly. And that's perfectly fine - this is my journal, I can write about anything and everything I damn well please. Besides, to be honest, when I try writing for an audience, it's obvious. It reads as being contrived, as though I'm pandering for attention or something.

So I may not be the most politically active and articulate person. Thanks to you that write about those issues, I can get a better understanding of what I hear on the radio while I'm getting to sleep, or just waking up.

I have my issues. I have my many-colored days. I'm not the best at leaving comments for others - but I do read what you all have to say. It's taken me a long time, but I'm starting to discover where my talents lie. I still get frustrated with myself over truly asinine things. I apologize too much. I want to speak my mind - and when I do, I feel bad about it. I write erotic stories - yet can't bring myself to watch porn. I've just gotten to where I don't feel bad for being angry.

Yet, those of you that read me, still read along. Even when I'm not having the best of days - or I don't come across as the most intelligent person ever.

I appreciate knowing that.