Advice Needed

[hiddenmuse]

Just a warning - this is yet another entry about coming out.

As you all know, I did come out to my mom, who then outed me to the rest of the family. However, I have yet to come out to my dad.

For those who have come out to family, how did you go about it? Since my initial coming out was a "she asked, I told" deal ... this is something else altogether.

Did you just say, "I have something to tell you..." or "I'm gay" or did you have some other method to convey it?

This is a somewhat fragile relationship, and I'm doing what I can to rebuild it, so I want to do what I can to fuck it up as little as possible.


Thank you! :-D

Comments

[goneplumwild.livejournal.com]

i came out to my dad and my uncle, who are fully supportive of me. i mean hey, it's awesome to bond with male members of my family by means of talking about hot chicks.

[hiddenmuse.livejournal.com]

That's great - although, unfortunately, with my family there's no way that I'd discuss hot chicks with them!

Ah well - that's what my friends are for!

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

My mum figured it out for herself as you know.

I told my stepmum I didn't have a boyfriend, but I did have a girlfriend on the phone, and she volunteered to tell my dad, who was raised in a north Sicilian mountain village, as a Catholic.

His response was, "Assa long ass a you 'appy."

You might be surprised.

[hiddenmuse.livejournal.com]

I kind of did the same thing when I talked to my dad. I mentioned my girlfriend a few times, as well as saying something about my wheezing waking her in the middle of the night...

Considering that our relationship is being rebuilt and every time that I talk to him, he's so happy to hear from me, I feel like I could tell him that I'm a transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania - and he wouldn't care, because his daughter's back in his life. :-)

[rosiedoes.livejournal.com]

Awesome! I'm glad to hear that. ♥

[bexone.livejournal.com]

Well, when I came out to my mom, it was a totally random, doing-little-domestic-things moment where I said something along the lines of "um, by the way, I'm bi?" and she looked at me and said "uh, yeah, I kind of knew that." which is why I haven't really had much to say on the subject, because my story really is kind of anticlimactic.

...of course, there's always the time I accidentally came out to the 70-year-old habited nursing sister who works at my hospital. Fun times!

[hiddenmuse.livejournal.com]

Oh no! Coming out to a nun or any other clergy member would probably be something that I'd do!

[bexone.livejournal.com]

"accidentally," please note. There was no calm and orderly thought behind this. There was only:

Her: "You'll find the right boy someday."**
Me: "Or girl."
Her: "..."
Me: *facepalm*

--

**also please note, at least this has lessened the interest she takes in my sex romantic life? Somehow this is only weird and not actually creepy once you know her, though.

[jenxteen.livejournal.com]

Reading this I just realized I had a dream about your Mom telling your brother. But in my dream I knew your brother and he was possibly famous. And it may not have been you. But I definitely had a related dream.

[hiddenmuse.livejournal.com]

That's awesome!

Well, my brother did have some notoriety as a "ladies man" when he was a teenager ... but I don't think that counts!

[season.livejournal.com]

since i am not gay i don't have any coming out story, but my friend dan told me that when he told his mother that he was gay she said to him "dan, i've always known you were special" isn't that cute. but then again, the way dan talked about his childhood he sounded a lot like betty's nephew on ugly betty...

[hiddenmuse.livejournal.com]

I love Betty's nephew - the boy is so cute and (unintentionally) campy!

I'm sure that your friend was probably a lot like that as a kid - and it would be especially funny if he were prone to dancing around and singing show tunes. :-)

[season.livejournal.com]

yes, dan does dance around and sing showtunes.

[rosesandvine.livejournal.com]

OMG! Now that you mention it, my cousin who recently came out to the family used to ride his bike around when he was 5 or 6 singing "Luck be a lady". His mom owned Barry Manilow's Showstoppers. The family was like, oh um, yeah, wekindaknewalready.

Carly no advice, but good luck if you haven't already talked with your dad.

Hi!

[liandriel.livejournal.com]

I'm here at the recommendation of my darling fragbert. I hope you don't mind if I stick around.

I did come out to my mom, who then outed me to the rest of the family.

This line alone makes me think your mother and mine are two peas in a pod.

Re: Hi!

[hiddenmuse.livejournal.com]

Hello! Please stick around, and don't mind the occasional insanity! :)

Considering that we both survived the Mormon church, I wouldn't be surprised if our mothers are two peas in a pod!