hiddenmuse: (emo lawn)
 So, a lot has happened since my last post from a few months ago. Where to begin:

  • Moved into a new place in May - still in San Francisco, just in a different neighborhood.

  • Still not working (blah)

  • Kellie and I are obviously still in the process of divorcing - that's a way to spend the summer, eh?

  • While I don't have Cleo; I am cat-sitting for Kellie, so I get to see the little dude while she's out of town on business. (Which is pretty often this summer)

  • I managed to injure my left knee twice: once during the course the move to my new place. The second time when I had an atonic seizure (essentially a "drop attack") and twisted my knee. About a week or so after that...lucky me, I sprained my right ankle *and* foot. (I also have a small fracture in my foot from the torn ligament, and a piece of the bone on the inside of my ankle has cracked off. Good times.)

  • I've been suffering from insomnia; and when I do actually sleep, my body has decided that I'm on a swing shift worker's hours since I don't get to sleep until about 5 in the morning and usually sleep until about 1 pm.

  • I'm turning 40 at the end of July. And while 30 and 35 weren't so bad, 40 is killing me. I've never felt so miserable in my life, you know?

hiddenmuse: (Love - NYC)
( You're about to view content that the journal owner has advised should be viewed with discretion. )
hiddenmuse: (childhood)
It's been entirely too long, and so much has happened. Where to start?

On the work front: I've been doing temp work for the past few months, so that's pretty nice. My current position is (unfortunately) too junior for what I typically do, so it's kinda sucky at times and I feel kind of stupid and helpless.


On the life front: Kellie and I have separated, after four years of marriage. We came to a realization that while we're great friends and a lot of other things.... Our marriage was just falling all to hell and we weren't happy.

For the time being, we're still living together until I can get a few months' emergency fund saved up with my ultimate intention to move out before June. Then, the divorce will begin.


On the health front: I've been suffering from migraines since the summertime. Serious headaches with "someone please turn off the sunlight. now." light-sensitivity that happened enough that I was put on Topomax - which has helped my seizures (yay), along with Imitrex as my "rescue" medication. Now I get to have seizures *and* migraines during my period. Yay me! :-D


So that's my life - in a kind of condensed version.
hiddenmuse: (Geek Girl)
I'm still here - the job I posted about ended up being swooped up by someone else. *sadface*

herein lies my job search blabbering )
hiddenmuse: (Panic!)
Since there have been a fair number of "older" Panic! At The Disco fans (like me) that have our share of gripes about the younger fans - everything from their abuse of capitalization, shit spelling, and ridiculous emo angst to their whining about how the band was better three years ago (sounds familiar to me, as a Metallica fan) or taking a joking comment as somehow being gospel.

To hopefully combat this, I've started a group for us "older girls" where we can get together and commiserate over the frustration with those "goddamn kids that need to get off the fandom lawn".

[livejournal.com profile] disco_grannies is a place for the over-21 fans, where you can fine sane, smart, wicked, like-minded and dirty-minded people who have put high school far behind us.

If you're not already there, and you're interested ... come on over! And spread the word!
hiddenmuse: (Dreidel Kitty)
The job search is still going - I found a job listed that I swear was almost screaming "Carly, this is for you ... don't be a dumbass, apply for it!"

PERSONAL LINES ACCOUNT MANAGER


IPS has an opportunity for a talented, ethical and experienced account manager to work in personal lines insurance with very important clients. Our client company is a relationship based, quality driven and rapidly growing insurance agency. There is recognition for your achievements and an environment that values each employee and their career path.

JOB DESCRIPTION:
Day to day servicing of assigned accounts (Did that.)
Prompt, accurate and courteous service/communication to clients, account executives, partners, and insurance companies (Did that too.)
Placement of Personal lines coverage’s for existing clients and new business prospects, coverage, rating, binders, endorsements, etc. (Done that ... and oh yeah, it's "coverage", not "coverage's")

QUALIFICATIONS:
Seven or more years experience working in a brokerage with high net worth clients (Got it - not all clients were, but I had a good percentage.)
Insurance P&C license in good standing (Got it.)
Proficient with agency management software, Applied a plus (Guess what? I've got it - 15 years, too!)
Strong knowledge of insurance terminology, coverages, policies, procedures (Oh yeah, I've got that ... and I'm working on starting a blog to help explain that sort of thing.)
Excellent written and oral communication skills (Got that, too)
AA degree or equivalent combination of education and experience (Got my AA - General Ed - in 1996)

BENEFITS:
Our client offers competitive benefits. (Cool! Benefits are a very good thing!)

And you'd better believe that I applied for the job!! So, now it's just a matter of seeing what happens from here.


Also I put up my resume on Monster.com last night (like around midnight), and I've gotten a couple of responses already. It's craziness - I almost feel like a girl with a quickly filling up dance card or something. Nothing may come of any of it, but it's kind of flattering to be honest.
hiddenmuse: (Dead/Alive Cat)
You know, for all of my talk in the past week - reality has been setting in and it does hurt.

My depression does seem to be elevated to a degree. It's kind of easy, with the lack of hiring and feeling kind of like a failure because of it - even though that's no fault of my own.

I'm getting unemployment (oh fun...) and got word from COBRA that my insurance benefits were apparently terminated at the end of November. (Gee, thanks folks. That's really kind. Let me go one day, end my insurance the next day. Whatevery.) Yet I managed to get all of my prescriptions filled by December 2nd with no problems. :) Still, I have to apply for COBRA since I can't be uninsured - my health conditions kind of preclude that being an option.


Tonight, I went to Kellie's company holiday party - and it was the first time I'd gone out in a couple of weeks. I am typically (a bit) antisocial, but it just felt wonderful to leave the house for something more than running errands. I know some of Kellie's co-workers - I'm friends with a few of them - and got to meet more of them, so I did have a good time at the party. Also, one of our friends was a client of mine - and he told me to let him know when I moved to a new agency, because he'd move his insurance to that agency! (this made me feel good, it was a nice little vote of confidence)
hiddenmuse: (just shy)
On Thursday I told my mom that I lost my job - she was really great about it; she told me that she loved and supported me, and that I was one of the strongest people that she knew. When I told her about the environment with my prior boss and some of the other stuff (head-up-their-ass strictness on the continuing education classes ... long, boring story there), she told me that I was probably better off somewhere else.

We talked about some other stuff, including SEGA's Sonic balloon in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade (Kellie works at SEGA, and was one of the balloon handlers). She told all of her co-workers that Kellie would be in the parade(!), which I thought was really cute - that my mom would do that, telling people that her daughter-in-law would be in the parade. But what really touched me was the fact that she told people, period -- that people know that her older daughter is married. To another woman. And no one probably gives a damn.


And... My mom is also awesome because today (Friday), she called me this afternoon just to check in with me and see how I'm doing.
hiddenmuse: (Namaste)
Yesterday I filed for unemployment, and looked at different websites to see what is available - even though there really isn't any hiring in December.

I'm still doing what I can to keep "some semblance of normalcy" - continue to look at the websites, start working on a resume, reaching out to my company contacts, everything else.

On the home front, I'm running the needed errands and trying to get the place cleaned up. Just little things, you know?


In the meantime, tonight was a pretty decent night.... Chinese takeout and early '90s TV ("Parker Lewis"), then "Top Chef" and "Beavis and Butt-Head" with Kellie.
hiddenmuse: (FUCK!!)
I'm setting about for another pity party here - just a forewarning.

One Good Day Job - No More )
hiddenmuse: (drummer)
It's Veteran's Day, Remembrance Day (for my Canadian friends), 11/11/11 and Nigel Tufnel Day - a tribute to the man that had amps that went up to 11, where others' only went up to 10.

So, in honor of Nigel Tufnel, I want to know my lovelies and sexy bitches - what songs do you like to turn up to 11?

Here's my own list of "11 To Go Up To 11"


1. The Smiths - “How Soon Is Now?”

2. Outkast - “BOB”

3. Kiss - “Strutter”

4. Spinal Tap - “Big Bottom”

5 - 6. Queen - “We Will Rock You/ We Are The Champions”

7. 2pac - “California Love”

8. Warren G - “Regulate”

9. Notorious B.I.G. - “Hypnotize”

10. Metallica - “Fuel” (from the “S&M” cd)

11. AC/DC - “Back In Black”
hiddenmuse: (Girls in love)
Kim Kardashian (or "Kardasssian", as Joel McHale would say it) is getting divorced. After 72 days of marriage. They spent a shit-ton of money on the wedding and reception, only to decide to call it quits just over two months in.

Kellie and I had a very simple wedding, with no reception (didn’t have the funds), and we’re still together after 3+ years.

Take a guess as to whose marriage is destroying the sanctity of marriage: the married for 72 days (and divorcing) heterosexual couple - or the married for 3 years (and still going) lesbian couple.


And take a guess as to which side my mom is on with this whole thing - hint: she's not in alignment with the "Sanctity of Marriage" folks. :-)

Like I told my mom, when Kellie and I got married, no one came to us and said that our getting married suddenly destroyed their marriages. She just laughed and said, "well, maybe not to your face!"



Dude, even the seal gets it...
hiddenmuse: (Boobs)
I'm at about 90-something% better, which is so much better than where I was a couple of weeks back.

Unfortunately I was taking a new steroid (Prednisone) in addition to my day-to-day Advair (which has a steroid) to get better. This is unfortunate because steroids fuck with your immune system... so while I was working on healing (via antibiotics and the Prednisone), the steroids were going to possibly hinder my improvement!

Anyways, I did manage to improve - and not develop 'Roid Rage. I still have a bit of a malingering cough, but it's far better than where I was previously! :-)


And in other - pervy girl - news ... my Lesbian Cred is possibly in question (yet) again.

God damn you, Spencer Smith!! )
hiddenmuse: (Bitchface kitty)
So my body is giving my its due comeuppance for being such a goddamn boy about being sick (no offense meant to my lovelies of the opposite sex, just that some of you can be really fucking stubborn about being sick - "It's just a sprain! Don't mind that it's swollen to the size of Kanye West's ego...").

I let a bout of bronchitis drag out for over a week because it came on, then went away a couple of days later. Only to come back a few days after that, worse. And I'm asthmatic, so I really know better... Now, I get the usual week of antibiotics, and two weeks of Prednisone (go steroids!). Blah.

At least I have some TiVo'd movies (The Shining and Secretary) and possibly some remaining codeine cough syrup at home to keep me company. :-)
hiddenmuse: (Dead/Alive Cat)
I'm listening to the Lou Reed / Metallica song, "View", and I don't know... It sounds like a poetry slam set against a heavy metal backdrop. Just not working for me, which disappoints me, since I like both musicians' work individually. Oh well, they did try.


In other news and nonesuch - don't know if I've mentioned it, but apparently there is some family scandal on my sister-in-law's side. (yes, the perfect Stepfordian veneer has been tarnished). Her brother apparently got a girl pregnant - and of course, they weren't married. Now, I'm waiting for a gay family member. :-)

And now with something a Church muckety-muck said in the General Conference (basically a ginormous state of the church union thing) - I'm waiting for a potential shitstorm from the sister-in-law. Apparently members were told to have as many children as they could, as long as they can financially afford it. For the SiL, who adopted our nephew, that might feel like a slap in the face.

And for more unrelated stuff - I have a Tumblr, where I am doing all of my (potentially) annoying fangirling. If you're willing to brave that kind of thing, I'm "parkerlewiscanlose".
hiddenmuse: (FUCK!!)
Not that it was a bad story or anything; it just takes my aphasic brain about a million years to spit out the story in addition to my already being a crap storyteller (when it comes to oral storytelling).

The background: we had a continuing education class yesterday, and part of it was for "World Class Customer Service". At one point, there was a discussion about instances of good customer service we'd experienced in the past 30 days. My experience was the prior Friday - I went to one of my favorite piercing/tattoo shops to get a piercing checked out, as well as to see about getting some new jewelry. In the middle of looking at the jewelry, I had a seizure. The employees were really nice, helped me to a seat and one of them (Becky - love her!) stayed with me while I came out of my seizure and back into reality.

While my co-workers and everyone else know about my epilepsy and understand that seizures happen from time to time - I'd probably have to add that whole deal to the story (bleargh), which could make me as well-liked as a co-worker who sometimes gets the subtle death glare when she opens her mouth in one of those continuing education classes!

So yeah good customer service is not freaking out if I have a seizure in your shop, and being really chill about the whole situation. I appreciate it, because I'm already mentally freaking out as it is and the last thing I need is everyone else around me doing the same or worse.

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