hiddenmuse: (Love - NYC)
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hiddenmuse: (procrastinators)
If nothing else, I'm glad that the weekend is coming, so I can have time (and inclination) to do laundry and maybe clean the place up some.

Tomorrow, I'm getting my hair colored. I thought I'd give Travis's coloring skills a try, because as much as I like my current colorist, he's a bit sloppy at times. Must be a trade-off for being so f'ing cheap (under $100). I'd like to come out of the salon with good color - on my hair only, please! (One prior instance with the current colorist resulted in my favorite Hello Kitty Hissfits shirt being wrecked. *commence pouting*)


Anyways - there's that. Also, I'm getting another step closer to the allergy shots. I'd never thought that holding an EpiPen in my hand would be so anxiety-provoking. Hopefully, I'll never have to use it, but just the fact that I'll be carrying one around is/was giving me cold feet about the whole process. To balance it out, my health insurance was being assholian about paying for the EpiPen. They didn't. So, I spent $130 for something that could either save my life, or be a waste of my money.


I'm sure there's a lot of other things that I can write about, but I don't know what to say! Hopefully, my lovelies, you all will have a good day today, and an even better weekend! I think we all need it right now. :-D
hiddenmuse: (Default)
You know, I tried the whole religion thing for several months. I did enjoy it - especially since I was in a queer friendly church. But, unfortunately, my bad experience with religion kept rearing its ugly head, and any time I began to comtemplate the idea that contrary to what many would say, G*d loves me as I am, I'd just fucking lose it.

Don't get me wrong. I still believe that there is a G*d - male, female, Flying Spaghetti Monster - and that I am loved, no matter what. I have to constantly remind myself of that, since I grew up in a faith that tended towards being sexist and homophobic (and for a long time, racist).

Being made to feel like I was a bad person for being single well into my 20s, with well-intended friends trying to set me up with their single friends and/or relatives. Because of this, I felt like I was doing something wrong, since I saw women that were teenaged mothers getting married in their 20s - how come they could meet somene and get married? What about me?

Never feeling like I belonged - that I was just *there*, taking up space, filling a spot in a pew.

Just not getting the whole premise of the faith.

Having heard stories of friends being made to feel like horrible people for having mental illnesses - for the record, telling a depressive that they're "not strong enough spiritually" or "that they should pray harder", does *not* work and only makes matters much worse.

Trying so damned hard to be straight, to conform to what others expected of me, unable to find a confidante to discuss the frustration of being queer and not being able to tell anyone, for fear of being disowned by my family.


Yeah, definitely not a happy place there.
hiddenmuse: (World Peace)
The past couple of days have been strange, to say the least.

Yesterday... )

Today - or, "Caturday"1, for the I Can Has Cheezburger fans - was much better. I got my hair cut - will try to get some pics taken at some point. Right now, it's a wind-blown, tousled mess! (And [livejournal.com profile] icedmaple, thanks for letting me "borrow" your prior hairstyle! I wound up with something similar to it, which I like. Kellie's just bummed that it's not shorter in the front, so I can faux-hawk it.)

I finally gave in and ate "people food" - having soup, Jamba Juice, frozen yogurt and other soft foods was getting a little boring. I went to a taco truck near the salon, and had a really good quesadilla. Even got past my paranoia over biting into anything, so I did enjoy it. I just went into it like, "if my mouth hurts like hell after this, it was *so* worth it." (No problems so far!)

This evening, Kellie and I went on a date - saw Ocean's 13, which was a really good movie, except for the man sitting nearby, who kept explaining parts of the film to his teenaged daughter; had dinner at a nearby restaurant - it was pretty good, although since the place was still quite new, they were out of a lot of things! :-/

Now, I'm home, just hanging out, and unwinding from today.


1 - The word "Caturday" has almost ruined any song with the word "Saturday" in it - Elton John's "Saturday Night's Alright For Fighting"; Bay City Rollers' "Saturday Night", and Fall Out Boy's "Saturday". The last one is especially bad for me, since I have it on my iPod, and automatically sing, "Caturday..."
hiddenmuse: (iEat)
Dear Steven Page and Patrick Stump,

You have both stolen my gay.

I'd appreciate getting it back any time now.

Also, I think that my wife would appreciate it, too. (Although, I think that my wife may pounce Steve, since he's rocking that spiky hair and all...)

Love,

Carly
hiddenmuse: (World Peace)
Dear Band-AidTM Blister Block -

You suck. I applied the stuff as the package recommends. Even did it repeatedly through the morning.

Yet, I'm still dealing with my feet being rubbed the wrong way by my damn shoes.

That, or it's just these frackin' Payless shoes. No matter, my feet hurt.

Bitches and hos, man ... bitches and hos.

-- Me
hiddenmuse: (Jackassery)
I'm feeling better than I had over the weekend - but, I guess that anything's better than feeling like an overgrown emo kid.

It's a Monday, which means that it's kind of a blah day. Probably better that way, though. None of the self-inflicted drama from the weekend.

So, how's your Monday going?
hiddenmuse: (eye)
Today was pretty decent - compared to yesterday, I'd imagine that *anything* could be better than that.

Sure, I had a few teary-for-no-reason moments, but it's getting better. Besides, I got to indulge in some retail therapy! Y'see, Lane Bryant has this brilliant program called "Real Women Dollars". Basically, it's their way of getting you to spend money for the reward ($25 RWD for every $50 spent) that you can redeem at a later date. Of course, they probably do this not just for return customers and loyalty, but on the assumption that you'd probably forget that you had the RWD, and won't use them.

Anyways, about the retail therapy. I actually found a few shirts that fit (no small feat, since I have "Hi Helens" that dictate how a shirt will fit on me, and what size I can wear); got some new jeans, tank tops and panties - a girl can never have too many panties ... heh. With my RWDs, I only spent under $120 with tax for over $200 in clothes.

Also, I went to see Eldo, to get my tragus jewelry changed. My piercing is a bit swollen, so there was no "wiggle room" with the jewelry, and I needed to get a slightly longer barbell to remedy that. I did that, and also discussed car insurance with Eldo (weird, I know) ... and being a major dork, I wanted to go back and tell him that coverage I'd recommended for a car in storage wasn't the right coverage! (I'd suggested Liability only - but really, it should've been Comprehensive only, since the car isn't being driven.) Well, that's for another time. Besides, if he calls to discuss insurance, I can go over it with him then. :-) And, I don't know what I did to deserve it, but I was ready to pay for the jewelry, and I was told "it's on the house". Too kind of him! :-)
hiddenmuse: (kissing)
First, to get the crap out of the way: I hate allergies. I've been taking Zyrtec (generic, purchased from Canada Pharmacy) - two pills a day, which means that I've been taking more than the average dose. But, this is on my doctor's recommendation {that would be my awesome allergist (the Good DoctorTM)} - and I'm still dealing with waking up in the middle of the night with itchy ears and throat; sneezing and the contradiction of a runny/ stuffy nose.

Okay, so it might help if the place gets cleaned up - get rid of the cat hair on the floor, so on and so forth. But, in the meantime ... blah.




Now, for that slice of Happiness Pie: I've been making mix CDs for work, so I can have some decent tunes at the office. One CD is just both of The Hush Sound CDs (Like Vines and So Sudden), and my other has The Bird and The Bee CD, as well as songs by Nellie McKay, Feist, Goldfrapp and Imogen Heap.

Are there any other themes/mixes that I could work up? Do any of you have suggestions? Honestly, I'm not very good at this kind of thing ... so I'm just happy that my new CD of The Bird and The Bee, et al. sounds remotely decent. :-)
hiddenmuse: (eye)
This morning, while playing "nurse" for Kellie (she'd gotten a scrape on her finger from a bottle cap), she said that I'm "Female Mormon Nice". :-)


The "Mormon Nice" comment comes from an article in the current BUST magazine about Mormon feminists - one of the women interviewed said, "we're not just Mormon Nice ... but Female Mormon Nice. And that's a lot of nice."
hiddenmuse: (Lesbians)
Okay, so I admit that I wanted to be "decent" ... or at the very least, not be a snarky C U Next Tuesday about this ... but, for those playing in Dead Pools: Jerry Falwell is dead. Yep, he kicked the bucket, DFO-ed, bought the farm, pushing up daisies ... any other euphemism for death.

You know, if he does go to Heaven, I like to think that he'll get the shock of his life when he's surrounded by those "evil" feminists, lesbians and Pagans. Or, maybe South Park had it right - and he'll just go straight to Hell since he chose the wrong religion!

Anywho ... I was discussing the news with a co-worker, and we talked about what Falwell would hear when he reaches the Pearly Gates. The consensus is: "Sorry, no vacancy! Although, there are some (permanent) holding cells. IN HELL!!" So, dude, don't forget your sunblock, and don't let the gates hit you where the good Lord split ya!

Besides, as my friend [livejournal.com profile] docwebster mentioned, apparently there will be a protest at his funeral. Just not by queer leftists, those godless heathens. Oh no ... even better. It's In-Bred Fred and The Westboro Baptist Cult Church parishoners. Yeah ... just a little odd, isn't it? Guess the Patriot Guard Riders were getting the better of him, what with the rumble of Harley engines drowning out his rants.





Enough of that snark. Onto something that's not being discussed as much in the blogosphere: Hard Rock songs being turned into lullabyes. Led Zepplin; Radiohead; Bob Marley; The Cure ... even Tool (yes, "Sober" has been stripped down to lullabye goodness).

What's especially disturbing to me is: Rock-A-Bye Baby - Metallica. Yeah, this one includes "Enter Sandman" - yes, a song about crib death. (The line "we're off to never never land" was originally supposed to be "disrupt the perfect family")

Yeah, just what I'm going to play for my kid. Fifteen years later, they'll be in therapy going, "every night, I felt like I was going to die. Like my family was wanting me to die..." Not worth it, dudes.




p.s.: Kellie's really good in bed.

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